Festive Shopping with Mac, Grandpa, Ronnie, and Doug.

Thought it might be fun to share a short scene from the third (and final) Mac and June novel with you all. It’s also timely because it takes place in a department store in Aberdeen, a few days before Christmas 1976. Here you go:

Ronnie spoke to Mac out of the side of his mouth. “I feel like a pervert in here.”

The two men stood waiting in the ladies’ underwear section of the store. “I wouldn’t worry about it,” Mac answered, pointing at Grandpa, whose nose was inches from a hanging rack of ladies’ panties, wearing a look of lustful ecstasy. “I don’t think the store detective will be making us his first arrest.”

Ronnie nudged Mac. “Not even the second. Look at Doug.”

Mac followed his father-in-law’s gaze to see Doug cupping his hands on a bra, closing his eyes for a second, shaking his head, then performing the same maneuver on a different size.

Ronnie grabbed Mac’s arm.“Oh, for fuck’s sake. Come on.”

They walked over to the dumbfounded Doug. Ronnie smacked his brother’s arm.

“Fuck me, Douglas. Are ye tryin’ to get yersel’ arrested?”

“I dinna ken Peggy’s bra size. I was goin’ off of memory.”

Ronnie sighed. “Well, I’d say she’s probably about the same size as Bessie in that department. Wouldn’t you say, Mac?”

Mac blushed. “I haven’t really made much of a study of your wives’ chest sizes.”

Grandpa walked up. Ronnie snorted. “Oh good. The panty sniffer’s here.”

Grandpa ignored Ronnie’s barbed comment. “What are you lads up to?”

Ronnie stared at his father. “Buying fishin’ tackle. What does it look like?” He nodded at Doug. “Brains here has forgotten his wife’s bra size. I said she’s about the same as Bessie.”

Grandpa scratched his chin. “Thirty-four C.”

Ronnie stepped closer to his father, towering over him. “And just how would ye ken that?”

“Simple. We were lookin’ at a mail order catalog a few weeks back and Bessie was disappointed that a bra she liked didnae come in her size.” He got a faraway look in his eye. “Brigid, the nurse, she has to get hers specially made. Someplace in Leeds.” The old man’s eyes glazed over. “Ye should see it. It’s quite the marvel of engineering.”

Ronnie shook his head. “Okay, that’s enough. Doug, find a—what did you say, Don Juan?”

Grandpa’s attention had been distracted by a voluptuous woman in a wool suit and high heels. “What? Oh, thirty-four C.”

Ronnie, ignoring Mac’s silent mirth, and turned to Doug. “Did ye hear the man, Douglas? Thirty four C. Hurry up. We need to get oot o’ here, afore we all end up in jail for public indecency.”

Doug rifled through the underwear and found the right size. He held up his trophy, like an Olympic gold medal.

Ronnie knocked down his brother’s arm. “Fuck me. Let’s go.”

They all headed for the cashier. Mac walked beside Doug. “Nice bra. Very sexy. You should get some matching panties.”

Doug turned to Mac. “No.”

“Why not?”

“She never wears any,” Doug answered, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.

Mac knew at that moment he’d never be able to look Peggy in the eye again.

Ronnie looked at his watch. “Come on, you bastards. The pubs are open.”

 

Here are links to the first two books:

US Links: Mac and June: Love In The Time Of Oil

Mac and June: Never A Dull Moment (Volume 2)

UK Links: Mac and June: Love In The Time Of Oil: Volume 1

Mac and June: Never A Dull Moment: Volume 2

 

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